[Ultimate] Alpha Troubleshooting Guide
cmc5788
Join Date: 2009-10-06 Member: 68959Members
Join Date: 2009-10-06 Member: 68959Members
<div class="IPBDescription">Alpha doesn't work? Check here first!</div><u>Alpha Troubleshooting Guide</u>
<b>You will need the following ingredients:</b>
<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->- the fresh-spilled blood of a virgin lamb (must not be AT ALL coagulated!) *
- a tarnished golden goblet from ages bygone **
- bone dust from the weather-bleached skull of a still-born fawn ***<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Mix the bone dust with just a pinch of water and it should chalk up nicely. With the wetted dust, scrawl a large pentagram on an unblemished oaken floor. Be certain that the center of the pentagram is large enough to sit in, cross-legged, without breaking any lines. WARNING: I ASSUME NO RESPONSIBILITY IF YOU BREAK THE LINES. Now, gather the other ingredients and carefully bring yourself to sit in the center of the pentagram. Pour the blood into goblet. If the ritual is working, you should notice the aged goblet begin to spontaneously regenerate (the tarnish falling away of its own accord, etc). Drink the blood. At this stage you may feel antediluvian darkness tugging at the edges of your soul. Don't panic: this is perfectly normal.
Now download your latest graphics and sound drivers, run Driver Cleaner (installing on top of old drivers is what most people do, but it's actually not recommended), install the new drivers, make sure the game AND your desktop are set to your monitor's native resolution. If the problem persists and you're running any unusual setups (SLI or dual monitors) you may want to try temporarily disabling this to see if it fixes your problem.
----
* If fresh-spilled lamb blood is unavailable, you can probably make due with grape juice. The pure stuff, though, not from concentrate. It hates concentrate.
** I tried this with a plastic limited edition Spiderman cup, once, and it wasn't too bad. Substitute at your own risk.
*** The only known replacement for this reagent is Magenta Crazy Chalk. Don't ask.
<b>You will need the following ingredients:</b>
<!--quoteo--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE </div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->- the fresh-spilled blood of a virgin lamb (must not be AT ALL coagulated!) *
- a tarnished golden goblet from ages bygone **
- bone dust from the weather-bleached skull of a still-born fawn ***<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Mix the bone dust with just a pinch of water and it should chalk up nicely. With the wetted dust, scrawl a large pentagram on an unblemished oaken floor. Be certain that the center of the pentagram is large enough to sit in, cross-legged, without breaking any lines. WARNING: I ASSUME NO RESPONSIBILITY IF YOU BREAK THE LINES. Now, gather the other ingredients and carefully bring yourself to sit in the center of the pentagram. Pour the blood into goblet. If the ritual is working, you should notice the aged goblet begin to spontaneously regenerate (the tarnish falling away of its own accord, etc). Drink the blood. At this stage you may feel antediluvian darkness tugging at the edges of your soul. Don't panic: this is perfectly normal.
Now download your latest graphics and sound drivers, run Driver Cleaner (installing on top of old drivers is what most people do, but it's actually not recommended), install the new drivers, make sure the game AND your desktop are set to your monitor's native resolution. If the problem persists and you're running any unusual setups (SLI or dual monitors) you may want to try temporarily disabling this to see if it fixes your problem.
----
* If fresh-spilled lamb blood is unavailable, you can probably make due with grape juice. The pure stuff, though, not from concentrate. It hates concentrate.
** I tried this with a plastic limited edition Spiderman cup, once, and it wasn't too bad. Substitute at your own risk.
*** The only known replacement for this reagent is Magenta Crazy Chalk. Don't ask.
Comments
Yes it will. Take 2 Aspirin. Call again after next Alpha version. Thank you.
i know! my anger is
<!--sizeo:5--><span style="font-size:18pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo--><b>OVER 9000!!!!!!!!!</b><!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec-->
lol couldnt resist!
<a href="http://img695.imageshack.us/i/alphaaa.jpg/" target="_blank"><img src="http://img695.imageshack.us/img695/6642/alphaaa.th.jpg" border="0" class="linked-image" /></a>
"This is blasphemy! This is NS!"
"NS? THIS. IS. ALPHAAAA"
<a href="http://img695.imageshack.us/i/alphaaa.jpg/" target="_blank"><img src="http://img695.imageshack.us/img695/6642/alphaaa.th.jpg" border="0" class="linked-image" /></a>
"This is blasphemy! This is NS!"
"NS? THIS. IS. ALPHAAAA"<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
I approve.