Drugs & The Use Of..

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Comments

  • LikuLiku I, am the Somberlain. Join Date: 2003-01-10 Member: 12128Members
    That sucks, I wouldn't mind if she wouldn't do it anymore.
  • BurrBurr Join Date: 2002-11-19 Member: 9358Members
    welcome to the natural selection off topic forum....if you have a problem, then somebody here has a solution...
  • MoquiaoMoquiao Join Date: 2003-05-09 Member: 16168Members
    ***************** says:
    are you breaking it off with me?

    and now.. i dont know what to say. honestly.. i want to say yes.. this isnt the first time she has lied to me.. she wants me to trust her.. and i tell her like everything to do with my ex who wont leave me alone... just so she knows.. and is like not worried... and what do i get in return?

    i think this is turning into a freaking soap opera...

    cos i just dont know...

    and as far as getting help, i have had things like 'anger management' when i was going through my unruly teen age.. but i was like triple the average :/ and it didnt help none...
    basically.. i like to think im independant.. and im careful who to trust... and i feel let down.. cos well.. i cant trust her. my last gf i walked in on having sex with my best friend. so yeah trust is pretty important.. and so whats to say.. this isnt the same.. i know i shouldnt compare.. but that is if you trust the person.. if you dont trust them they could be doing anything...and for all i know she is..
  • SirusSirus Join Date: 2002-11-13 Member: 8466Members, NS1 Playtester, Constellation
    Here's the first thing I want you to do right now Moquioa, forgive her. Do it right now. I'm not asking you to put yourself in a relationship in which you are compromising your promise to yourself, you've been through a traumatizing ordeal, and I understand that, even if you two break apart you <i><b>must forgive her</b></i>.

    I want you to show grace to her. Even when you feel wronged you do not want to live your life with a grudge. Not only should you show grace, but when you show grace you absolve the conflict within your own heart. It's hard making the leap from where you were then, and now, since you've known of her past. It's difficult, don't get me wrong, I can tell you stories of shattered relationships where there was such a lack of grace that it tore them apart, even forty years later they wore it on their heart, something that cannot be gotten rid of until they forgave.

    She's looking to you for forgiveness, give her that at the very least, neither of you can do anything else until that is done.

    <!--QuoteBegin--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->i feel cheated.. and decieved.. its like.. i want her to pay for it.. if you understand :S
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    This is the wrong thing to do, give up your vengeance. Do it now. She may deserve it, but that's not how you should live, it will not heal, you or her. Leave justice to God. It is by no means, your place to judge, you may want to, and I <b>know</b> you have been hurt, but please, Moquaio, leave your desire for justice.

    Moquaio, I can tell that you're very passionate about this, but a system of ungrace will be perpetual until forgiveness, neither of you will find a conclusion, you will not find justice, it will not be quenched.

    If I were in the same situation I don't know if I could still trust her, but I know I would forgive her. Do that, and when you're done, give us a status report. <b>Trust me on this, you need to forgive her above all else right now, however unnatural, or how hard it may be, genuinely find it within yourself to do it. When you can do that, tell her that</b>
  • MulletMullet Join Date: 2003-04-28 Member: 15910Members, Constellation
    I think when the time comes, you will know exactly what to say. IMO, asking for advice from all of us just seems like your way of letting your steam off and trying to see if you can relate with other people. If she truly is the one, then you will easily be able to say to yourself that you can live with this woman for the rest of your life. Goodluck.
  • MoquiaoMoquiao Join Date: 2003-05-09 Member: 16168Members
    well, being apart physically makes thigns very hard to deal with right now.. esp as we cant be watching each others backs 24/7 like we should be...

    Sirus.. i wanna thank you.. seriously..i want to thank all of you very much for your input.. especially nikon.. and Vulgarmenace... but Sirus. thankyou. you were right...

    and yes we have spoken... and were going to be ok

    i wanted her to feel bad.. i wanted her to know how much she hurt me.. and being we are 2000 miles away right now.. we cant show that too well.. but i cant tell you exactly how cos it all got abit emotional.. but yeah...

    she is ok, and i got a smile out of her

    Thankyou very much you guys.

    im not a big social person. and so i do turn to places like this when i need help.. and you guys have always been here.. when i got engaged... you were the first people i told...
    it sounds corny and cheesy and pathetic.. but in all honesty.. i wont actually forget the help i have had form you people.. so thankyou.

    goodnight.
  • MulletMullet Join Date: 2003-04-28 Member: 15910Members, Constellation
    You are welcome! <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->

    I hope you two make the right decisions and live a happy life! <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo-->
  • SnidelySnidely Join Date: 2003-02-04 Member: 13098Members
    Are you getting engaged because you want to get a home/children asap? Or is it because you think you want to spend the rest of your life with her? From what little I can tell from your posts, it sounds like either you can't trust her or she can't be trusted. If so, nothing will make it work. Best to get on with your life. <i>*shrug*</i>
  • ThansalThansal The New Scum Join Date: 2002-08-22 Member: 1215Members, Constellation
    /me points at Lord Nikon (I love hackers, can't help it <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->) and Sirus

    these are people to listen to.

    I am glad you think you will be able to deal with this.


    My one thing that I have to bring in:
    This is gona sound realy bad so here it goes <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->

    I understand you have serious problems with drug use (and I can understand why)
    However, most drug users are not bad people and have probably never done much wrong (I know alot of people who have tried just about everything).
    I am not telling you to just drop these negative fealings for drug use, what I would advise is for you to get some help (counciling style).
    I would actualy sugest going to counciling with your respective other, simply so that you both can talk about these things in a controlled environment.

    I know, counciling sucks (I hate it and am curently avoiding going back for the time being). But for something like this (a nearly irational hatred of something)m counciling can OFTEN help (not always).

    I just don't wana see you 2 break up over this at a later date.
    I know you to be a good person (from the times I have talked to you and your posts), but something like this can still pose a problem even after the initial hit is over.


    Just keep it in mind mate.



    And good luck to both of you.



    /me scritchies the wolfie.

    good luck
  • SirusSirus Join Date: 2002-11-13 Member: 8466Members, NS1 Playtester, Constellation
    Well I'm happy for you Moquiao ! I hope that you both have a great Christmas together, and that all goes well. It's a really difficult thing you're going through, I'm happy that things are becoming clearer for you.

    I've found a good quote from one of my favorite persons. I would like you to remember this, even if you still dislike what she has done in the past, or any transgressions she may have against you in the future does not mean that you love her any less, it does mean that you love her more, grace should increase with conflicts. You may dislike what she may do, and you can and should love her still.


    "Love may forgive all infirmities and love still in spite of them: but love cannot cease to will their removal"
    - C.S Lewis
  • NikonNikon Join Date: 2003-09-29 Member: 21313Members, Constellation
    You and yours have my best wishes Moq, may you learn from you mistakes in life instead of repeat them.
  • MoquiaoMoquiao Join Date: 2003-05-09 Member: 16168Members
    <!--QuoteBegin--Snidely+Dec 5 2003, 02:51 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Snidely @ Dec 5 2003, 02:51 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Are you getting engaged because you want to get a home/children asap? Or is it because you think you want to spend the rest of your life with her? From what little I can tell from your posts, it sounds like either you can't trust her or she can't be trusted. If so, nothing will make it work. Best to get on with your life. <i>*shrug*</i> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    its neither... like that guy said.. ill admit.. i do have issues... and they arew with me for life..

    i blame nobody but me.. cos the blame has to fall on me for my defects.. but things like walking in on your best friend going at your girlfriend doggy style makes you lose ALL trust.

    sticking up for your friends. and being outnumbered like 8 - 1 cos your friends who you stuck up for ran off...

    all the stuff with my father.. yeah.. i do have problems and ltos of them...

    many of these are to do with trust.. i have hardly any friends.. not for lack of want.. just for lack of people who are worthy of the trust...

    crystal broke that barrier.. and she made me feel a love i never thought was possible...

    i can trust her. what she said was wrong.. and she knows it and i do... but i took that which could have been solved.. and mix it with my past.. and well it spirals. she is the most trustworthy person i know.. and i would die for her. i do love her. from the bottom of my heart.. which is why it caused so much pain at first.

    thankyou once again guys <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->
  • LupineLupine Join Date: 2003-11-22 Member: 23394Members
    Well, we did talk, and yes, things are gonna be ok. I only joined here because of the beautiful thread on engagement <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif'><!--endemo--> but yeah, I read this too.... and thank you to everyone that posted replies (even when I didnt like what they said, bc it was a matter of perspective and opinion, and well, thats what was needed, both sides)

    And I have to say, Tommy summed it all up tonight in the end:

    Moquiao[PE] says:
    i said im hungry
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    and i look right
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    and there is a sandwich...
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    a ham freaking sandwich
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    but honest to god
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    i dont remember making it
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    god is such a ****
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    hes like
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    yeah imma **** with your life for a bit for fun
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    ok that was mean have a cookie



    I love you Sweetheart... and well, you know the rest.
  • SirusSirus Join Date: 2002-11-13 Member: 8466Members, NS1 Playtester, Constellation
    edited December 2003
    <!--QuoteBegin--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Moquiao[PE] says:
    god is such a ****
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    hes like
    Moquiao[PE] says:
    yeah imma **** with your life for a bit for fun<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->


    I've got another C.S Lewis quote for this one.

    "Tribulations cannot cease until God either sees us remade or sees that our remaking is now hopeless"

    Maybe someone is trying to shake you up so that you see something ? Yes, it's painful, but if it wasn't...why would you want to listen ?
  • NikonNikon Join Date: 2003-09-29 Member: 21313Members, Constellation
    heres something I found quite inspiring in times of doubt............ not sure if you are in fact religous....... but if you are, here you go

    I asked for Strength.........
    And God gave me Difficulties to make strong.
    I asked for Wisdom.........
    And God gave me Problems to solve.
    I asked for Prosperity.........
    And God gave me Brain and Brawn to work.
    I asked for Courage.........
    And God gave me Danger to overcome.
    I asked for Love.........
    And God gave me Troubled people to help.
    I asked for Favours.........
    And God gave me Opportunities.


    I received nothing I wanted
    I received everything I needed
  • xioutlawixxioutlawix Join Date: 2002-11-05 Member: 7118Members, Constellation
    edited December 2003
    I guess we should get the informed opinions of a confirmed druggie in here, namely myself, to get the other side's point of view <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo-->

    In my day, I've done <takes deep breath>
    Weed, XTC, acid, gel tabs, amt, coke, shrooms, xanax, special k, crystal meth, and various combinations of all...
    <takes another breath>

    I look at it this way. Know yourself.
    Know your mind, know your body, know your source, know your substance.

    In a lot of cases, there's a negative stigma attached to substances simply out of ignorance, and other times there's a negative stigma attached to a substance which is deserving of it, but for all the wrong reasons. I see drug use as being no different than riding a rollercoaster, or playing video games for example. They really serve no purpose at all but entertainment, but like anything else, you have to take it in moderation. A lot of drugs believed to be the equivalent of playing russian roulette really aren't. On the other hand, there's also an equal number of drugs whose long term effects no one really knows anything about.
    Great resource: <a href='http://www.erowid.org' target='_blank'>The Vaults of Erowid</a>

    I would say for your part, that more than any sort of problem you have with the use of drugs itself, you have an emotional hangup left over from the biproduct of drug use of one of your family members. As has been stated before, whether this marriage happens or not comes down to you being able to put that aside and accept the fact. I'm not going to tell you one way or the other which is the path for you, as everyone is entitled to have the opinion they want to have. I can only suggest a little education on the subject matter if you wish to try and tolerate it, or you can shake your head, say "I'm not going to deal with it," and walk away from the situation.
  • lolfighterlolfighter Snark, Dire Join Date: 2003-04-20 Member: 15693Members
    I read the thread while I was writing all kinds of stuff, but it seems I am no longer needed, so down the drain it went. Take care Moq, and have a good time. <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->
  • Daza4Daza4 Kerc Kasha Join Date: 2003-04-06 Member: 15233Members
    To be blunt if she has used that many drugs she is addicted. She will waste your money etc etc on drugs, Again being blunt just dump her. You can't risk your whole life on one girl.
  • Smoke_NovaSmoke_Nova Join Date: 2002-11-15 Member: 8697Members
    I'm glad you two resolved it.

    The best thing in a relationship is honesty. Truly and completely. But, Wolf, I know your irrational fear of something. Mine is alcohol. I hate the stuff, because I lost part of my childhood to it. (try learning to play sports without a father of any kind except one that doesn't really like you). My father was a drunk, and I can't bring myself to trust drunk's.

    A while back my GF had a couple shots before going to a party. Now while a couple shots might not be much to you or me, she is an alcohol newb, with a fast-metabolism. She had the drinks before the party, where she was surrounded by drunk people, while wearing a rather lewd costume. I couldn't be there to protect her, and I couldn't trust the other people at the party. I freaked when I found out, much like you did.


    But, back to you. Just talk some more about each other's respective pasts. Trust in each other.

    and remember, NS.org: Where we help you...in exchange for your gaming life!
  • uranium_235uranium_235 Join Date: 2002-11-20 Member: 9478Banned
    edited December 2003
    I would dump her like a sack of bricks, then dump a sack of bricks on her. Drugs are 100% your fault, and I have absolutely no respect for anyone who does drugs, heavy alcoholism (If obviously unrelated to genetics), or smoking, and frankly I consider them secondary citizens (Yes, I feel quite strongly on it), having most of my family dead of any one of the above.

    Personally I agree with what other people said: You're 18. You're an idiot to have a fiancee already.

    @ Sirius: I crack up every time someone says 'leave it to god'. Talk about irresponsibility... 'oh it's not my problem'. Ahh thus is Christianity...
  • monkeymastermonkeymaster Join Date: 2003-02-20 Member: 13771Members
    edited December 2003
    Ok, im not going to bother reasing that huge post, but i have a couple things to say.

    If your going to take drugs, dont use the exuse of *oh my life is ***** or simmilar things like that. because like ive said above, its just an exuse. and proves that you are weak minded.

    before you start thinking about taking any drugs, stay away from heroin and simmilar drugs, i say this because this is the drug that took my sister life, she passed away at the early age of 22 because of a heroin overdose.

    and remmember, anything can happen. thinking things like *oh this will never happen to me*, well...it just doesnt work like that.

    as for smoking weed, i say go for it....as long as its done properly, if you smoke weed the same way you smoke your ciggs then your simply stupid.

    and another thing to remmember, theres a difference between Crazy and Stupid.

    In a nut shell, just stay away from drugs and alcohol, smoke a cone every now n then, just dont do anything STUPID involving those other drugs.
  • AgentOrangeAgentOrange Join Date: 2002-11-18 Member: 9244Members
    edited December 2003
    <!--QuoteBegin--Daza400+Dec 5 2003, 12:54 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Daza400 @ Dec 5 2003, 12:54 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> To be blunt if she has used that many drugs she is addicted. She will waste your money etc etc on drugs, Again being blunt just dump her. You can't risk your whole life on one girl. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Never read such a blatant misinformation before in my life.


    Just because someone has tried a variety of substances does not make them addicted to any one of them...

    edit:

    <!--QuoteBegin--monkeymaster+--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (monkeymaster)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->as for smoking weed, i say go for it....as long as its done properly, if you smoke weed the same way you smoke your ciggs then your simply stupid.
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    WTH does that mean? Don't inhale? Sorry but that's a great way to be wasteful...Maybe I don't get what you mean though. If you mean don't smoke the same ammount of weed as cigs I agree...
  • monkeymastermonkeymaster Join Date: 2003-02-20 Member: 13771Members
    edited December 2003
    Ok my previous post was a little of topic to the thread.

    Ok about your girlfriend, if you cant help her in any way then yes, end your relationship with her. in the situation with my sister, she was extremley addicted and spent a hell of alot of money on drugs. anything she stole, she ended up selling for the drugs.

    if this girlfriend of yours is addicted, and you find out that she is doing such things as steeling your stuff to sell for drugs, then the relationship has to end.

    i know how it is to live with a drug addict and i know its not very nice. but try to help her, if u can. like i said before, if you cant help her then end the relationship.

    dont do it in such a hard way though, drug addicts often think about suiciding, something such as breaking up with her could trigger something like that.
  • BeastBeast Armonkyi Join Date: 2003-04-21 Member: 15731Members, Constellation
    Read this thread and began to get really worried, then read that the situation had been solved. Congrats, hope you two have a long peacefull life together ^^.
  • Daza4Daza4 Kerc Kasha Join Date: 2003-04-06 Member: 15233Members
    <!--QuoteBegin--@gentOrange+Dec 5 2003, 03:40 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (@gentOrange @ Dec 5 2003, 03:40 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin--Daza400+Dec 5 2003, 12:54 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Daza400 @ Dec 5 2003, 12:54 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> To be blunt if she has used that many drugs she is addicted. She will waste your money etc etc on drugs, Again being blunt just dump her. You can't risk your whole life on one girl. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Never read such a blatant misinformation before in my life.


    Just because someone has tried a variety of substances does not make them addicted to any one of them...

    edit:

    <!--QuoteBegin--monkeymaster+--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (monkeymaster)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->as for smoking weed, i say go for it....as long as its done properly, if you smoke weed the same way you smoke your ciggs then your simply stupid.
    <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    WTH does that mean? Don't inhale? Sorry but that's a great way to be wasteful...Maybe I don't get what you mean though. If you mean don't smoke the same ammount of weed as cigs I agree... <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    It still beats the fact. Wow i see alot of kids dealing do i try them? Fu*k no. Its stupidity to even try drugs.
  • Vulgar_MenaceVulgar_Menace Join Date: 2003-10-29 Member: 22118Members
    huzzah! *requests all of our titles to be changed to "love doctor"*
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