Fusion Cannon
Demiguise
Marks Servers Reg Join Date: 2004-01-19 Member: 25462Members
Marks Servers Reg Join Date: 2004-01-19 Member: 25462Members
<div class="IPBDescription">BIG GUN!!!</div> <span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>The Cannon</span>
"Is that Thing ready yet?" Boomed the Commander
"Nearly sir, we are just calculating the energy rating of this weapon" The scientist in a weak voice
"It better be ready soon, the captain wants it finished in the next 24 hours!" Said the commander
It was judgement day for the scientist working on the Fusion Cannon. This beast was designed to destroy planets with a single shot fired directly at the core. This was the end result of years and years of work. So far the Earth had releyed upon the Anti-matter principle. But these scientist thought they had a new energy device. They used Matter and Anti-matter to create the base power of the core. But they injected something into the core which allowed it to focus it power along with the Lens which focused it even more.
The only reason that this was created was because of the mothership. The Ship that could rival the Behemoth was coming to town, and the military wanted a weapon that could destroy the ship.
wanted to do this but couldnt be bothered to add other stuff. maybe later i will fix it.
"Is that Thing ready yet?" Boomed the Commander
"Nearly sir, we are just calculating the energy rating of this weapon" The scientist in a weak voice
"It better be ready soon, the captain wants it finished in the next 24 hours!" Said the commander
It was judgement day for the scientist working on the Fusion Cannon. This beast was designed to destroy planets with a single shot fired directly at the core. This was the end result of years and years of work. So far the Earth had releyed upon the Anti-matter principle. But these scientist thought they had a new energy device. They used Matter and Anti-matter to create the base power of the core. But they injected something into the core which allowed it to focus it power along with the Lens which focused it even more.
The only reason that this was created was because of the mothership. The Ship that could rival the Behemoth was coming to town, and the military wanted a weapon that could destroy the ship.
wanted to do this but couldnt be bothered to add other stuff. maybe later i will fix it.
Comments
...This beast was designed to destroy planets with a single shot fired directly at the core....
... They used Matter and Anti-matter to create the base power of the core... <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Thats one BIG reactor...
Minimum to destroy an inhabitable planet* irreversibly is about 2.2E32 joules.
At 100% energy efficiency it requires 2.4E12 TONNES of reactant...
...Whoa... Never knew the frountersmen were that advanced...
(*large enough to support an atmosphere capable of supporting life)
Minimum to destroy an inhabitable planet* irreversibly is about 2.2E32 joules.
At 100% energy efficiency it requires 2.4E12 TONNES of reactant...
...Whoa... Never knew the frountersmen were that advanced...
(*large enough to support an atmosphere capable of supporting life) <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Are you some type of proffesor?
Anyway the point of sci-fiction stories is to write anything that will be impossible (or nearly). If he would like to keep it real indeed that would be LARGE. And I realy dont think he wanted it to look like the Death Star.
Well anyway, fix what you have to fix, but quick!
<!--emo&::nerdy::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/nerd.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='nerd.gif'><!--endemo-->
No... I'm just a first year engineering student...
Its only some physics and intergration. not exactly difficult <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif'><!--endemo-->
And to make it easier I didn't do the hard part <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif'><!--endemo-->
maybe the coming of the mothership to earth?
Even though it really should be in a new topic.
<span style='font-size:14pt;line-height:100%'>The Mothership</span>
"RED ALERT" "RED ALERT" "This is the commander speaking, all hands to battlestations!" the commander barked into the intercomm.
The Scientists had fired the Cannon and were quite pleased as it managed to blow pluto out the orbit. Since then the military had decided that this weapon is too valuble on the earth and so moved it to the new Flagship. The Bahamut. This ship was in design close to the Behemoth, but with several modifications made by the Fusion Reactor. These were things like better laser turrets and a Gravity Drive capable of letting the crew travel Distances far beyond the destructed Pluto.
Now was the real test of the Cannon. The military outpost at Titan (maybe something to do with my other story <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo--> ) had picked up a Ship of a massive nature that was headed towards the outpost. Though further communications were lost with the outpost and they presumed that it has been captured until, they saw the strangedt light in the sky which orgininated from the Planet Titan. When they looked at titan they saw nothing and thought that the Antimatter reactor had Blown.
The ship was thought to be the Mothership of the Aliens and the military brass wanted it dead. So the Bahamut and a fleet of other ships were sent to engage and destroy the vessel. 5 days passed as the Bahamut and its fleet moved towards the Enemy Ship, under what they hoped was Radio silence. The Ships engaged the Enemy with the much smaller ships moving towards the Alien ship and the flagships staying behind while the Bahamut Powered up to fire the Cannon.
Ships were surronding the vessel and they tried to open comms with it. But no answer, While the ships were surronding the vessel, they did not see the small cacoons that flew from the ships. All the Flagships saw was their Counterparts Sit there. Suddenly Voices piled up on the comms.
"Oh god, they came from outside!"
"This is the Spaceship...........*static*"
The ships blew up one by one and everyone knew that it was the Aliens.
The flagships begin deck by deck serachs making sure that there were no holes in the Hull. They found 20 of them and the ships were begining to become tense.
"This is the Bahamut, All systems show green and we are ready to deploy and fire the Cannon"
Thier hearts felt hope and then the Marines began searching for the aliens. As they searched, the windows were closed as the effects of the cannon were quite devestating.
The doors of the Bahmut opened and the cooling vents came out of the ship. Then came the Fusion cannon, as big as the ship, you could see the core lighting up and the vents throwing out hot gasses. Then the beautifull moment came. The beam Powered up and you could see a small Purple ball glowing, The ball suddenly Fired and the Mothership stood no chance and it blew up with a trimendus flash.
The problem was that the Vents had become blocked, The Bahamut was in a state of peril and they did not know what to do! The only thing they could do was to eject the Cannon and to Warp somewhere.
The problem was that the too flagships had become infested and the Bahamut was amazed at the rate of infestation. The only thing they could do was to evactuate the Ship and then blow it.
On that very same day, the earth was in night-time and people across the nations got to see the Twinkling that was the Destruction of the Bahamut,
Now some nitpicks...
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->"RED ALERT" "RED ALERT" "This is the commander speaking, all hands on deck." Shouted the Commader.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Maybe '"This is the commander speaking, all hands to battlestations!" the commander barked into the intercomm. ' would be better?
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->The Scientists had fired the Cannon and were quite pleased <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> It should really be the engineering team, scientists do alot of the theory, engineers apply the theories to design and build these ships But, hey, its sci-fi! Doesn't have to be realistic!
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->as it managed to blow pluto out the orbit.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->If it can irreversably dis-assemble an Earth-sized planet, there won't be much left of Pluto and Charon. Possiblity of "low" powered blast?
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Since then the military had decided that this weapon is too valuble on the earth and so moved it to the new Flagship.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->A flagship is the ship commanded by a flag rank officer in real world navy classification. The Bahamut certanly is of a size to be commanded by a flag officer, if it can mount your massive cannon!
Also, modifcations to the ship would have been quite immense if weapons of this type are so rare. Just keep that in mind... That things so powerful that the energy beam has a mass of 2.4E12 tonnes.
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->This ship was in design close to the Behemoth, but with several modifications made by the Fusion Reactor. These were things like better laser turrets<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> Try 'modifcations made possible by the Fusion Reactor.', I think it makes a bit more sense
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->and a Gravity Drive capable of letting the crew travel Distances far beyond the destructed Pluto.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->This is possible with current tech, if you don't mind the trip time <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif'><!--endemo-->. Insert a rapidly and then this makes more sense.
Depending on accelerations produced you may need inertial compensators to prevent the crew from becoming red smears on the nearest bulkhead. These may aid the ship in controlloing recoil effects? Just somethings to think about.
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->...picked up a Ship of a massive nature...<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Maybe its just me, but i find that phrase awkward. I'd use 'picked up a ship of garganuan proportions'
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Though further communications were lost with the outpost and they presumed that it has been captured until, they saw the strangedt light in the sky which orgininated from the Planet Titan.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->I'd try and split that sentance up. it's currently abit long.
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->When they looked at titan they saw nothing and thought that the Antimatter reactor had Blown. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->I take it they tasked an optical telecope to take a look? This means light-speed communications (probably vhf radio if we're using light speed comms, its simple and works;)) and can be used to build a bit of dramatic tension in places. A more detailed way could have the command staff listening anxiously to the transmission when it abruptly cuts off... A seinor officer yells to get a telecope pointed in the right direction and when the pictures come through... Nothing! Titan is gone! Disappeared with barely a sign! some one tentivley suggets a catastrophic antimatter contaiment failure... possibly due to weapons fire (scientists will not say for definate about something unless they've had alot of time to look over data... even then they'd hedge their bets)
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->The ship was thought to be the Mothership of the Aliens and the military brass wanted it dead.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Size? Is it huge compared to their ships? What shape is it?
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->So the Bahamut and a fleet of other ships were sent to engage and destroy the vessel.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Size of supporting ships? fleet size? A bare handful of ships scraped together in a hurry or a swarm of ships?
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->...under what they hoped was Radio silence.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->generally they know if they're running silently or not <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif'><!--endemo--> They could be hoping to run in undetected by maintaining a no (or extremely tight beam eg laser/maser) comms, no active sensors and keeping the drives powered down as low as possible.
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->The Ships engaged the Enemy with the much smaller ships moving towards the Alien ship and the flagships staying behind while the Bahamut Powered up to fire the Cannon.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->smaller ships would probably be classed as escorts, fulfilling a similar role to modern frigates and destroyers. The 'flagships' appear to be cruisers and above from the description, could be classed as capital level ships?
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Ships were surronding the vessel and they tried to open comms with it.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Titan gone and this is the first thing they do? Its your story though...
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> But no answer<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Make this its own short sentence, for more drama
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->While the ships were surronding the vessel, they did not see the small cacoons that flew from the ships.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Is there one enemy ship, or does the mothership have escorts or is it a carrier cable of carrying ships? Also, refer to the friendly ships as the fleet and the enemy ships as enemy ships to make the sides clearer.
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->All the Flagships saw was their Counterparts Sit there. Suddenly Voices piled up on the comms.
.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->'The group commanders sat there, waiting. It appeared to be a deadly stand off... The xeno's weren't responding...
Then the comms came alive with the sound of frantic fighting and hurried messages, one overlaying the other in a breif but loud muddle'
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->"Oh god, they came from outside!"
"This is the Spaceship...*static*"<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Nice messages
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->The ships blew up one by one and everyone knew that it was the Aliens.
The flagships begin deck by deck serachs making sure that there were no holes in the Hull.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->May want to add something about them thinking that it was due to boarding parties
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->They found 20 of them<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Per ship? Over the fleet in total?
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> and the ships were begining to become tense. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->I'd say crews instead of ships here.
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->"This is the Bahamut, All systems show green and we are ready to deploy and fire the Cannon"
Thier hearts felt hope and then the Marines began searching for the aliens<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->'...Their hearts felt hope, from the grandest admiral to the lowliest marine searching for the boarders'.
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->As they searched, the windows were closed as the effects of the cannon were quite devestating.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd--> Windows are weak, good thing you've got the shutters!
And to say that the cannon was quite devistating is like saying thats a slight understatment <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink.gif'><!--endemo--> I like it! <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->The doors of the Bahmut opened and the cooling vents came out of the ship. Then came the Fusion cannon, as big as the ship, you could see the core lighting up and the vents throwing out hot gasses.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Sapce may be cold (its supposed to be about 3 Kelvin) but there's only two ways to loose heat:
1) radiation
2)Dumping hot coolant overboard.
So this cooling system is scientifically sound! Don't let anyone tell you it isn't! As a bonus its a cool visual image <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->Then the beautifull moment came. The beam Powered up and you could see a small Purple ball glowing, The ball suddenly Fired and the Mothership stood no chance and it blew up with a trimendus flash. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->I like... I like alot... <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo-->
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->The problem was that the Vents had become blocked, The Bahamut was in a state of peril and they did not know what to do! The only thing they could do was to eject the Cannon and to Warp somewhere. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Could be made more dramatic. Prehaps a report from a weapon techician that they're overheating, coolant pressure rising and the reaction isn't stopping?
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->The problem was that the too flagships had become infested and the Bahamut was amazed at the rate of infestation. The only thing they could do was to evactuate the Ship and then blow it.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->More description! Possibly as reports from marines in contact with the enemy, passed on by the security cheif?
<!--QuoteBegin--Demiguise+Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Demiguise @ Jan 21 2004, 08:05 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->On that very same day, the earth was in night-time and people across the nations got to see the Twinkling that was the Destruction of the Bahamut,<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->Problem with that is the Earth is a globe, half will be in darkness all the time. Could be expanded into a really dramatic moment
Its a good short story, how about making it into a great one? a little time and polishing and it will rock.
? ?
<!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif'><!--endemo-->
I am using your story as a history of mine
i am sorry i did not ask permission.
No spoilers though.
Haha, do read my latest chapter, the Queen has appeared!