Decaying Pride
Disman
Kentucky Join Date: 2003-04-05 Member: 15227Members
Kentucky Join Date: 2003-04-05 Member: 15227Members
<div class="IPBDescription">My first Fan-Fiction (Love Writing)</div> (Please let me know what you think. I was bored so I thought I would type whatever came to my head. <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo--> Enjoy. )
Weakness. Fear. Each has the ability and necessity to feed of the other. The coldness of this place was enough to spark what little fear would be felt in even the bravest of men. The putrid remains of a gestational egg laid at his side, the half embodied form of a gorge's corpse laid within. It's eyes slightly wide in the realization that death was at hand. He never had a chance to do his duty did he? The hivemind would have felt his pain, his need, and his hatred for those whom had stumbled upon his grounds. Oh yes, the hivemind knew, and the hivemind will always pay her debts. Her children are to be gods among beings. They are the simplest and most deadly form of perfection.
Death. Would death follow with weakness and fear? Would it suit death to embrace one's weakness and fear? Or would death be welcome to end it all? Glazed eyes moved over the blurred scenry. A light flickered above briefly as the generators within the confines of the ship began to degrade. It's life - seeping away as well.
The room had found a new decore. The river of red slipped between his legs and fingers staining the exposed flesh, crusting over as the minutes passed by. To think, this was his favorite color. Perhaps, perhaps this will change his perceptions of this? And so this is how he spent his time, slumped against the pyramide of crates - they, acting as his head and backrest.
"My squad...."
Nanonites are fascinating machines aren't they? Having the ability to mend flesh and bone over small periods of time. To many this is a more than welcome technology. To some, at least to those who would preferr death, it is their worst enemy.
Sgt. Manandra's armor, at least pieces, were still lodged in his chest cavity, along with the front right paw of a four legged creature known as a skulk. The animal, who's long legs seemed to resemble large spikes versus the normal paw, laid silent upon the man. Smoke was rose from the pistol's chamber at his side, the blood sizzling, let off a nausiating stench.
It was funny. Or was it? One would have to be insane to think such a scene funny yes? Or perhaps Sgt. Manadra found it funny that he had finally found death only to watch the nanonites work their endless waltz as his flesh began to mend slightly cheating off the predator. Lt. Lenzi had thrown him the last medpack. The Lt. was far to wounded for it to have done him any good...
He did not have to use the nanonites. Maybe it was the fact that one of his comrades give it to him in his last few moments in the world of the living, or perhaps, even through all the sorrow and pain, he was still afraid of death? Then again humans tend to the strangest things. Yes, yes funny creatures they are.
Clunk. Like small glass shards the pieces of torn armor began to fall from the wounds as the nanonites performed their job admirably. Closing stained digets around the paw of the skulk, Manandra withdrew it from his chest, the soft release of air spewed in the room as the deflated lung colapsed fully. Like a fish without water he fell over, gasping for the air that wouldn't come.
The sounds of eight tiny feet began to echo down the coordior. Oh the sounds of bones on steel as the playful skulks hip and hopped down the walkway. Like music. The slight vibrations of the phase gate would be drawing their attention. The outpost was all but maimed beyond welding. To hell with it.
(This was just a start. Would someone mind giving me comments? do you like?)
Edit: Will edit periodically to add paragraphs and to tweak the story.
Edit: Added just a few paragraphs. Will add more today. I will probably edit the ones I have already put in as I was hasty in adding them. At work so I have little time to dedicate everything to the story. <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->
Weakness. Fear. Each has the ability and necessity to feed of the other. The coldness of this place was enough to spark what little fear would be felt in even the bravest of men. The putrid remains of a gestational egg laid at his side, the half embodied form of a gorge's corpse laid within. It's eyes slightly wide in the realization that death was at hand. He never had a chance to do his duty did he? The hivemind would have felt his pain, his need, and his hatred for those whom had stumbled upon his grounds. Oh yes, the hivemind knew, and the hivemind will always pay her debts. Her children are to be gods among beings. They are the simplest and most deadly form of perfection.
Death. Would death follow with weakness and fear? Would it suit death to embrace one's weakness and fear? Or would death be welcome to end it all? Glazed eyes moved over the blurred scenry. A light flickered above briefly as the generators within the confines of the ship began to degrade. It's life - seeping away as well.
The room had found a new decore. The river of red slipped between his legs and fingers staining the exposed flesh, crusting over as the minutes passed by. To think, this was his favorite color. Perhaps, perhaps this will change his perceptions of this? And so this is how he spent his time, slumped against the pyramide of crates - they, acting as his head and backrest.
"My squad...."
Nanonites are fascinating machines aren't they? Having the ability to mend flesh and bone over small periods of time. To many this is a more than welcome technology. To some, at least to those who would preferr death, it is their worst enemy.
Sgt. Manandra's armor, at least pieces, were still lodged in his chest cavity, along with the front right paw of a four legged creature known as a skulk. The animal, who's long legs seemed to resemble large spikes versus the normal paw, laid silent upon the man. Smoke was rose from the pistol's chamber at his side, the blood sizzling, let off a nausiating stench.
It was funny. Or was it? One would have to be insane to think such a scene funny yes? Or perhaps Sgt. Manadra found it funny that he had finally found death only to watch the nanonites work their endless waltz as his flesh began to mend slightly cheating off the predator. Lt. Lenzi had thrown him the last medpack. The Lt. was far to wounded for it to have done him any good...
He did not have to use the nanonites. Maybe it was the fact that one of his comrades give it to him in his last few moments in the world of the living, or perhaps, even through all the sorrow and pain, he was still afraid of death? Then again humans tend to the strangest things. Yes, yes funny creatures they are.
Clunk. Like small glass shards the pieces of torn armor began to fall from the wounds as the nanonites performed their job admirably. Closing stained digets around the paw of the skulk, Manandra withdrew it from his chest, the soft release of air spewed in the room as the deflated lung colapsed fully. Like a fish without water he fell over, gasping for the air that wouldn't come.
The sounds of eight tiny feet began to echo down the coordior. Oh the sounds of bones on steel as the playful skulks hip and hopped down the walkway. Like music. The slight vibrations of the phase gate would be drawing their attention. The outpost was all but maimed beyond welding. To hell with it.
(This was just a start. Would someone mind giving me comments? do you like?)
Edit: Will edit periodically to add paragraphs and to tweak the story.
Edit: Added just a few paragraphs. Will add more today. I will probably edit the ones I have already put in as I was hasty in adding them. At work so I have little time to dedicate everything to the story. <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif'><!--endemo-->
Comments
I wish I could write like that.
I knew someone was going to say this, or something along these lines...
I'm in writer's block. I can't write anything, and I just can't think of anything else. Maybe it's just 'cause I'm lazy...
I didn't want to write EXACTLY like he writes...
Sorry Disman did not mean to hijack your thread, where's the next bit, waiting, waiting, I enjoyed the thoughts of the two as their life was seeping and the way you left it so a return or a permanent death on the edge. waiting. Next bit please.
Sorry about that Disman... please continue...
Do you all think I'm taking to much time describing things? (i like to be descriptive) By doing so does it make the story boring? Pointers? Anyone?
I really do love this so far though. Just the right amount of darkness and detail. Really, this is the best start I've read of any fanfic here. CONTINUE or I will eat your babies.
<a href='http://mobianwarrior.tripod.com/monster/main.html' target='_blank'>Monster, unofficial 1.0 to 2.0 fanfic</a>