Monster - Part 20

DeepShadowsDeepShadows Join Date: 2003-02-11 Member: 13408Members, Constellation
in Fan-Fiction Forum
<div class="IPBDescription">gah, fiction forum overrun with rpg's...</div> <a href='http://mobianwarrior.tripod.com/monster/part20.html' target='_blank'>Click here to read part 20.</a>

<a href='http://mobianwarrior.tripod.com/monster/main.html' target='_blank'>Click here to start from the beggining.</a>


This one some might find... difficult. I've been looking forward to writing it. For those of you with a bit of confusion afterwords, things should make more sense to you in the next chapter.

For this one, I would really appreciate feedback of any kind. If you take the time to read it, take the time to leave a message. It doesn't have to be "gj keep it up" either, feel free to tell me what you liked, or more importantly, didn't <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo-->

Thanks. Have fun with it -
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Comments

  • AlignAlign Remain Calm Join Date: 2002-11-02 Member: 5216Forum Moderators, Constellation
    I'm not good at criticism, but I love your fan-fic.
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  • zoobyzooby Join Date: 2003-08-26 Member: 20236Members
    I'm taking a wild shot in the dark and saying the bacterium infected him.
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  • PFCNublarPFCNublar Join Date: 2003-04-23 Member: 15792Members
    Well, I wouldn't say that the bacterium infected him, I'd just say he's either:

    A. Delirious from all the stress that is now put on him
    B. The bacterium are transmitting a message to him somehow, but not via infection

    I think it's more B because he took a nap in the last chapter, and the bacterium are most likely transmitting a message into him during his sleep-euphora-like-thing.

    It was a rather spooky chapter. But, it had great atmosphere. The greatest chapter out of all of them in my opinion.
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  • Cold_NiTeCold_NiTe Join Date: 2003-09-15 Member: 20875Members
    Didn't he get parasited a few chapters ago? Or was he talking about how he had gotten parasited when he was in the hospital, and how it affected him differently than the TSA Marines because he wasn't wearing any protective armor. If the para had buried into him, it could be mutating him. Just a guess though...
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  • DeepShadowsDeepShadows Join Date: 2003-02-11 Member: 13408Members, Constellation
    Only time a parasite has been mentioned so far was in Samsa's logs, when he was talking about Darken's back story.
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  • noobynooby Join Date: 2003-04-21 Member: 15717Members
    Keep em guessing DeepShadows, who controls.
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  • KhaimKhaim Join Date: 2002-06-28 Member: 841Members, NS1 Playtester, Constellation
    o_O very strange, can't wait till some of it is explained next chapter.
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  • xectxect Join Date: 2002-11-24 Member: 9807Members
    Don't want spoilers, but how's the story progressing? I hate reading stories that stop in the middle of the action, so I'd like to know how this one is coming along, and if I'd end up in a horribly exciting passage with a "to be continued" in the bottom if I started reading now.
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  • DeepShadowsDeepShadows Join Date: 2003-02-11 Member: 13408Members, Constellation
    edited November 2003
    this story will be played out in full, so you won't get stuck with a "to be continued," and then ages of waiting for me to decide to start writing again <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo--> I will be writing the next chapter tonight and tomorrow.

    Also, I was tinkering with the idea of writing another story that is more action, classic-NS based. It would take place on this same ship, and would be a prequal to this story. There was a lot that went on in this ship, which everyone should be finding out in the coming chapters.

    However, I don't know if I could handle writing both at once:P Maybe when this is done...

    But ja, next chapter will be up in the next couple of days, if everything goes well.


    grr, damn server overflow causing it not to work, grrrrrr.....
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  • xectxect Join Date: 2002-11-24 Member: 9807Members
    <!--QuoteBegin--DeepShadows+Nov 19 2003, 05:23 AM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (DeepShadows @ Nov 19 2003, 05:23 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> this story will be played out in full, so you won't get stuck with a "to be continued," and then ages of waiting for me to decide to start writing again <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif'><!--endemo--> I will be writing the next chapter tonight and tomorrow. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Yeah, but when will it be played out in full? Since you're still planning on writing the next chapter, it obviously hasnt been yet, but is it close or is it far from it?
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  • DeepShadowsDeepShadows Join Date: 2003-02-11 Member: 13408Members, Constellation
    I'm writing the next couple chapters right now. You mean when will the entire story be posted? Don't know, over the next few months probably.
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  • xectxect Join Date: 2002-11-24 Member: 9807Members
    <!--QuoteBegin--DeepShadows+Nov 22 2003, 07:29 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (DeepShadows @ Nov 22 2003, 07:29 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I'm writing the next couple chapters right now. You mean when will the entire story be posted? Don't know, over the next few months probably. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><span class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Yeah, allright. Just asking because I hate reading a story where the last bit has yet to be posted *cough*Sanji*cough*, so I prefer simply waiting untill the last chapter is posted.
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  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    now the RPG's are safetly in their own haven!

    when is the next chapter gonna be done?
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