Ode To An Onos

Nicodem-XNicodem-X Join Date: 2004-03-01 Member: 27000Members
<div class="IPBDescription">Songs in the Key of O</div> Hi everyone. I made a couple of song parodies based on the majestic Onos. They have been slightly edited to conform with the no swearing policy on these forums and hopefully will not be viewed by the moderators as obscene. If so, I apologize in advance. Edited lines will be marked with a *. Anyway, hope you enjoy and feel free to post your own songs or comments.


<b>Onos Guy - parody of American Pie</b>

A long long time ago
I can still remember
How that Onos almost made me bile
And I knew if it had its chance
That I would be poop in its pants
And it would stop hungering for a while
While I was next to its liver
Its stomach acid made me quiver
That one misguided step
Now trapped in these sticky depths
Deeper and deeper down I slide
In its belly is where I reside
So it appears I'm trapped inside
The day the Onos died
So...

Hide, hide, from the huge Onos guy
Ate the heavy named Chevy before Chevy could fly
And all the scared marines, they began to cry
Screaming this'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die

This stomach fits like a glove
Is there any way out from above?
I'm feeling a bit like dough
And can't believe it swallowed me whole
Send help from the Command Console
And hurry, digestion isn't that slow

I think my life's starting to dim
I can feel my body getting slim
I guess I'll take a snooze
I ain't got nothin else to lose
You know, this is really starting to suck
Maybe there's still hope I'll be rescued by Chuck
But I knew I was out of luck
The day the Onos died
I started screaming

Hide, hide, from the huge Onos guy
Ate the heavy named Chevy before Chevy could fly
And all the scared marines, they began to cry
Screaming this'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die

If I can get out, I know I'll pwn
I'll shoot at their hive until its blown
All I have to do is get free
While I'm in here, I could be really mean
And find a way to gnaw through its spleen
Well, that is if I could only see
But I'm sure everything would be brown
And I really hope I don't drown
Oh, it's stomach just churned
Now I'm really concerned
I'd rather be eaten by a shark
*Nevermind that now, dang it's dark
If only I could strike a spark
The day the Onos died
We were screaming

Hide, hide, from the huge Onos guy
Ate the heavy named Chevy before Chevy could fly
And all the scared marines, they began to cry
Screaming this'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die

Helter skelter near the furnace smelter
Behind a gorge I tried to take shelter
The Onos was approaching fast
I choked on a Lerk's gas
*And nearly passed out, it smelled like grass
The Onos opened its mouth, inside was vast
At first I thought it wanted to spoon
Maybe it just wanted some poon
I briefly took a glance
And I saw its enormous lance
Picked up the gorge to use as a shield
But it just made the Onos healed
I began to pray as I kneeled
The day the Onos died?
We started screaming

Hide, hide, from the huge Onos guy
Ate the heavy named Chevy before Chevy could fly
And all the scared marines, they began to cry
Screaming this'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die

That's how I ended up in this place
As I feel an utter disgrace
Now bile is my only friend
Surrounding and hugging me, wet and thick
I think I'm going to be sick
Can't imagine such a disgusting end
Then I began to feel a rage
Wishing I still had my 12-guage
So I began to yell
Tried to ignore the smell
I guess no one would save me from my plight
Still stuck in here without a light
About ready to give up the fight
The day the Onos died
He was screaming

Hide, hide, from the huge Onos guy
Ate the heavy named Chevy before Chevy could fly
And all the scared marines, they began to cry
Screaming this'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die

I met an Onos who seldom chews
In it's belly surrounded by ooze
Digesting for about a day
When I couldn't take any more
That mighty Onos gave a great roar
And from outside it's gut I heard someone say
"Quickly, get him out of there team!"
And the Onos gave a final scream
As I emerged unbroken
I heard the marines jokin'
They all said that they thought I was toast
*And "Holy crap, you really smell gross!"
I didn't die but sure came close
The day the Onos died
And they were screaming

Hide, hide, another Onos guy
Ate the heavy named Chevy before Chevy could fly
And all the scared marines, they began to cry
Screaming this'll be the day that I die
This'll be the day that I die



<b>Very Hungry Onos - parody of American Woman </b>

Very hungry Onos, stay away from me
Very hungry Onos, please do not eat me
Don't come stomping over the floor
I dont want to see your horns no more
I got more important things to do
Than spend my time digesting in you
Now Onos, stay away
Very hungry Onos, listen what I say

Very hungry Onos, get away from me
Very hungry Onos, please do not eat me
Don't come stomping over the floor
I don't want to see you charging no more
Because something of your size
Now another marine dies
Now Onos, get away
Very hungry Onos, listen what I say

Very Hungry Onos, I said get away
Very Hungry Onos, listen what I say
Don't come stomping over the floor
I dont want to see your horns no more
I don't want to hear your screams
I always know what that means
Because something of your size
Now another marine dies
Now Onos, get away
Very hungry Onos, listen what I say
Very hungry Onos, stay away from me
Very hungry Onos, please do not eat me

I gotta go
So I jetpack away
Think I gotta go
I wanna fly away
I'm gonna kill you Onos
I'm gonna kill you Onos
I'm gonna kill you Onos
I'm gonna kill you Onos
Bye bye, bye bye
Bye bye, bye bye
Very hungry Onos
Not gonna eat me
I'm no good for you
Looking at you right in the eye
Tell you what I'm gonna do
I'm gonna kill you Onos
You know I gotta go
I'm gonna kill you Onos
I gotta go
I gotta go

I gotta go
Very hungry Onos


<!--emo&::onos::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif' /><!--endemo--> 4ever

Comments

  • CplDavisCplDavis I hunt the arctic Snonos Join Date: 2003-01-09 Member: 12097Members
    edited March 2004
    O
    M
    G

    That was beautiful... *Wipes tear.


    As the self proclaimed "biggest fan of the of the Onos" I salute you. <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    Very awsome first time post!
  • Resident_JadeResident_Jade Join Date: 2004-02-22 Member: 26799Members
    BEAUTIFUL!! <!--emo&::asrifle::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/asrifle.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='asrifle.gif' /><!--endemo--> <!--emo&::onos::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif' /><!--endemo-->
    very nicly done! (claps uncontrolably)
  • JavertJavert Join Date: 2003-04-30 Member: 15954Members
    edited March 2004
    That was better than half the Oscars.
    /me gives standing ovation!

    Excellent, I proclaim you the NS maestro! <!--emo&::onos::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif' /><!--endemo--> <!--emo&::onos::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • MulletMullet Join Date: 2003-04-28 Member: 15910Members, Constellation
    hahaha, that is awsome! now make it a .mp3!
  • MoquiaoMoquiao Join Date: 2003-05-09 Member: 16168Members
  • RaVeRaVe Join Date: 2003-06-20 Member: 17538Members
    LOL perfect

    Then we may get FFT to do it....if we pursuade them to <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • CplDavisCplDavis I hunt the arctic Snonos Join Date: 2003-01-09 Member: 12097Members
    heh I had done something like this a looong time ago.

    I did a remake of that Christmas song "Grandma Got Run over by a Reindeer"

    I changed the words to be "Flayra got run over by an Onos"
    but it jsut ended up being silly so I never posted it. <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • Nicodem-XNicodem-X Join Date: 2004-03-01 Member: 27000Members
    Thanks for the warm welcome everyone, I'm glad that you all enjoyed them <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    I would like to *attempt* to make these songs into mp3s because that would be really funny, but I'd need to find some instrumental/karaoke versions of those songs (preferably non-midi). I'd like to use the Lenny Kravitz version of American Woman for the Very Hungry Onos song. I have a few ideas for things that I could mix into the songs to give it more of that "Onos feel".

    Rave, who/what is FFT? Pardon my ignorance if it's supposed to be common knowledge.


    <!--emo&::onos::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • dr_ddr_d Join Date: 2003-03-28 Member: 14979Members
    edited March 2004
    <a href='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=35824&hl=ns+idol' target='_blank'>http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/in...5824&hl=ns+idol</a>


    NS song thread created a while ago, very good stuff in there, here's an excirpt from it, warning kinda long.

    "A phasgate to eclipse"

    Based on Led Zepplin's "Stairway to Heaven"

    There's a Comm who's sure all that glitters is res
    And he's buying a phasegate to eclipse
    And when he gets there he knows if the vents are closed
    With a word he can build what he came for


    Woe oh oh oh oh oh
    And he's buying a phasegate to eclipse

    There's a map on the wall but he wants to be sure
    And you know sometimes maps have no meaning
    In the vent by the wall there's a lerk who chuckles
    Sometimes all of our shots are misleading

    Woe oh oh oh oh oh
    And he's buying a phasegate to eclipse

    There's a feeling I get when I look at the rest
    And my team is crying for jetpacks
    In my games I have seen rings of marines through the spawn time
    And the voices of those who stand armory humping

    Woe oh oh oh oh oh
    And he's buying a phasegate to eclipse

    And it's teamchatted that soon, if we capture that room
    Then the Comm will lead us to Maintenence
    And a new two-hive lock down will make the game go long
    And the voicechat will echo with laughter

    And it makes me wonder

    If there's a bustle in your spawn
    Don't be alarmed now
    It's just a skulk eating your IPs

    Yes there are two gates you can go by
    but in the long run
    There's still time to change the equip you have on

    Your voicechat is humming and it won't go because you don't know
    The Comm's calling you to save him
    Dear marine can't you hear the Comm screaming and did you know
    Your phasegate dies on the very next bite

    And as we fly on down the vents
    Our JPs hover no longer than they should
    There walks an alien we all know
    Who stomps us out of flight and eats us to show
    How a lockdown still turns to us losing
    And if you listen very hard
    The voicecomm will come to you at last
    When all are dead and one is hiding
    To Comm and lock two hives and not win, is a 1.1 dream
    Woe oh oh oh oh oh
    And he's buying a phasegate to eclipse.

    There's a Comm who's sure all that glitters is res
    And he's buying a phasegate to eclipse
    And when he gets there he knows if the vents are closed
    With a word he can build what he came for


    And he's buying a phasegate to eclipse, uh uh uh.

    edit: slightly shorter song.
  • Nicodem-XNicodem-X Join Date: 2004-03-01 Member: 27000Members
    wow... there are a lot of song spoofs that people did in that thread... and some very very good ones too! Excellent job on that Stairway to Heaven spoof!

    I just came up with another one since someone in the other thread tried to come up with a spoof for Money by Pink Floyd but weren't able to. Hope you all like it <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif' /><!--endemo-->


    <b>Onos - parody of Money by Pink Floyd</b>

    Onos, get away
    Got a shotgun gonna slay without delay
    Onos, and Lerk's gas
    Gonna smash res towers and make a dash
    New scar, from that spar, run far, and scream
    They just ate the rest of my team

    Onos, get back
    Got a jetpack, I'm not just another snack
    Onos, don't get bit
    They'll swallow you whole and then take a sh*t
    I need a powerful HMG, from the armory, bet
    I'm able to kill you, no sweat

    Onos, they can't climb
    They can rarely eat you if you always fly high
    Onos, you're their prey
    Don't take a chance, you'll be their buffet
    Shoot them right between the eyes, meet their demise, and then
    They start to decay


    long live the <!--emo&::onos::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • BizZy_9mm_MessiahBizZy_9mm_Messiah Old School Member Join Date: 2003-07-25 Member: 18411Members, Constellation
    Lol. Someone, quick make an NS song!
  • Nicodem-XNicodem-X Join Date: 2004-03-01 Member: 27000Members
    <b>Save Our Res Tower - parody of Sanitarium by Metallica</b>

    You aim well with lots of skill
    Shooting skulks before they kill
    See that gorge, it's within your range
    It's harmless now but it can change
    It's running now from the fight
    Perhaps because it cannot bite
    Turn the corner, look what's charred
    And there an Onos standing guard

    Quick act fast and do not flee
    We need that res I guarantee
    Here comes the Onos in its rage
    Do not run I'll give you a 12-gauge

    Save our res tower, it's debris
    Save our res tower, before we get owned

    Here's a welder, go repair
    Things are quiet, but beware
    Do it now and don't complain
    Assuring you it must remain
    Must not let them fulfill their plans
    You must obey my demands
    Turn around, what is that smell?
    Another Onos, I can tell

    Here it comes and it's stompin
    Opens its mouth, now you're in
    In its belly is where you dwell
    And now you'll be turned into gel

    Save our res tower, it's debris
    Save our res tower, before we get owned

    Save our res tower... before we get owned!

    Back at base you spawn
    And you make a spoken vow
    Eject me from my chair
    And call me a noob
    Should've had a guard
    And this wouldn't have occured
    Now I must obey
    And join the other men
  • HawkeyeHawkeye Join Date: 2002-10-31 Member: 1855Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Nicodem-X+Mar 2 2004, 05:44 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Nicodem-X @ Mar 2 2004, 05:44 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> wow... there are a lot of song spoofs that people did in that thread... and some very very good ones too! Excellent job on that Stairway to Heaven spoof!

    I just came up with another one since someone in the other thread tried to come up with a spoof for Money by Pink Floyd but weren't able to. Hope you all like it <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif' /><!--endemo-->


    <b>Onos - parody of Money by Pink Floyd</b>

    Onos, get away
    Got a shotgun gonna slay without delay
    Onos, and Lerk's gas
    Gonna smash res towers and make a dash
    New scar, from that spar, run far, and scream
    They just ate the rest of my team

    Onos, get back
    Got a jetpack, I'm not just another snack
    Onos, don't get bit
    They'll swallow you whole and then take a sh*t
    I need a powerful HMG, from the armory, bet
    I'm able to kill you, no sweat

    Onos, they can't climb
    They can rarely eat you if you always fly high
    Onos, you're their prey
    Don't take a chance, you'll be their buffet
    Shoot them right between the eyes, meet their demise, and then
    They start to decay


    long live the <!--emo&::onos::--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tiny.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tiny.gif' /><!--endemo--> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Lol.. That looks so effortless to parody. I won't say how hard it was, because I didn't make it, but you did a good job with that one.
  • KhaimKhaim Join Date: 2002-06-28 Member: 841Members, NS1 Playtester, Constellation
    O.O.... Amazing. <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif' /><!--endemo--> ^_^
  • NarfwakNarfwak Join Date: 2002-11-02 Member: 5258Members, Super Administrators, Forum Admins, NS1 Playtester, Playtest Lead, Forum Moderators, Constellation, NS2 Playtester, Squad Five Blue, Reinforced - Supporter, Reinforced - Silver, Reinforced - Gold, Reinforced - Diamond, Reinforced - Shadow, Subnautica PT Lead, NS2 Community Developer
    /me prods fangzee to make more recordings
  • That_Annoying_KidThat_Annoying_Kid Sire of Titles Join Date: 2003-03-01 Member: 14175Members, Constellation
    /me joins in the proding
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