"hi, How Are You"

FCCFCC Join Date: 2003-07-16 Member: 18218Members
<div class="IPBDescription">The real meaning behind it</div> As our lives lengthen each day, we tend to acquaint new people whenever the situation is appropriate. While there are many ways to initiate the conversation, the most ubiquitous way is “Hi, how are you?” I’ve been avoiding the trouble apprehending this meaningless question for years; but procrastinating no more, I will perform a benevolent act for this world and translates the true meaning of “Hi, how are you?”

First and foremost, let’s take a look at the individual definitions of each word with the help of the knowledgeable dictionary.com:

Hi - Used to express greeting
how – In what state or condition
are – Second person singular and plural and first and third person plural present indicative of be
you - Used to refer to the one or ones being addressed

Following dictionary.com’s definitions: “I am saying hello, and in what current state or condition is one in?”

According to the general populace definition: “Hello, I am indifferent to what condition you currently experiencing. In other words, I really don’t give a damn about how you’re feeling. I am only asking this question because it is conventional. Please reply with good so I don’t have to ask you why you’re feeling down.”

Even the most innocuous people would find this absurd question to be offending.

Just picture the situation: Some complete stranger notices and starts to approach you with an ominous smile. You don’t have prescient abilities, but you know the apprehension you must face. Please don’t ask. Please don’t ask. Please don’t ask. Hi, how are you?

Now you’re in this dilemma. Do you reply with the conventional “Good”, or will you try to foray into a rebellious manner and reply with “Bad”? But replying with “Bad” will then lead to “Why” followed by a pointless reason to reply to “Why”, which could further prolong this seemingly perpetual situation. Look what this ominous stranger with his pseudo concerns has induced in you. This stranger is disinterested in how you’re feeling, in fact, by the time the question is asked, their probably contemplating whether to say “Hi, how are you?” to someone across the room.

“Hi, how are you?” may seem like an impeccable question, but beneath the letters lies a perplexingly atrocious question. Be sui generis and don’t say “Hi, how are you?”, and if asked, be unconventional and give them a taste of their own medicine by replying “I don’t know, but how are you?”
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Comments

  • ZaggyZaggy NullPointerException The Netherlands Join Date: 2003-12-10 Member: 24214Forum Moderators, NS2 Playtester, Reinforced - Onos, Subnautica Playtester
    VERY interesting, keep on telling such stuff xD
  • SpoogeSpooge Thunderbolt missile in your cheerios Join Date: 2002-01-25 Member: 67Members
    Glorious pontification.

    My favorite response to said greeting is, "Tasty". This, of couse, followed by my walking away indifferently.
  • twoflowtwoflow Singing Drunk Join Date: 2002-11-01 Member: 1950Members, Constellation
    I used to write like that. <!--emo&:(--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/sad.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • GeminosityGeminosity :3 Join Date: 2003-09-08 Member: 20667Members
    I love the fact that so many people are almost programmed into saying that XD

    Even I am a bit... it leads to weird things though where you just meant to say hi while walking past someone. You're saying 'how are you?' yet both of you keep walking while they respond (usually with little time to ask how you're doing in response as the distance grows). Very weird but funny =3
  • SwiftspearSwiftspear Custim tital Join Date: 2003-10-29 Member: 22097Members
    If your gonna say "bad" it is proper form to immediately follow up with a reason. IE "I'm not doing so good, I got like 2 hours of sleep last night, and I found out that some guy broke in stole all my refigarator magnets, and stabbed me while I WAS asleep."

    In this way you don't force the other person to ask you any more questions, and you leave open a short 5 word condolance and farewell "Well, thats too bad, Goodbye!"
  • TequilaTequila Join Date: 2003-08-13 Member: 19660Members
    edited August 2004
    <!--QuoteBegin--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> </td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin-->I used to write like that. <!--emo&:(--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/sad.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad.gif' /><!--endemo--><!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->

    Me too, I was practically forced to by A-level English Language. Hopefully at Uni I'll be able to form my own language, free from non-speak and self-gratuitous sentences.
  • im_lostim_lost TWG Rule Guru Join Date: 2003-04-26 Member: 15861Members
    I'm used to that question having a different use. I don't get asked that by complete strangers, nor do I go up to complete strangers and ask them that. Instead, it is a question asked by or to someone that I know, as a way to start the conversation. It's more a way of saying "Has anything interesting happened to you that you would like to start the conversation off with?" At least, that's how I see it.
  • FCCFCC Join Date: 2003-07-16 Member: 18218Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-i'm lost+Aug 10 2004, 01:25 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (i'm lost @ Aug 10 2004, 01:25 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I'm used to that question having a different use. I don't get asked that by complete strangers, nor do I go up to complete strangers and ask them that. Instead, it is a question asked by or to someone that I know, as a way to start the conversation. It's more a way of saying "Has anything interesting happened to you that you would like to start the conversation off with?" At least, that's how I see it. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    It is a quite inefficent method of starting a conversation. That person or you can save some time and just say Hi. Same meaning less oxygen use. How are you doesn't mean anything, and if anything, offensive is what it is.
  • SwiftspearSwiftspear Custim tital Join Date: 2003-10-29 Member: 22097Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-FCC+Aug 10 2004, 01:44 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (FCC @ Aug 10 2004, 01:44 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-i'm lost+Aug 10 2004, 01:25 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (i'm lost @ Aug 10 2004, 01:25 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I'm used to that question having a different use.  I don't get asked that by complete strangers, nor do I go up to complete strangers and ask them that.  Instead, it is a question asked by or to someone that I know, as a way to start the conversation.  It's more a way of saying "Has anything interesting happened to you that you would like to start the conversation off with?"  At least, that's how I see it. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    It is a quite inefficent method of starting a conversation. That person or you can save some time and just say Hi. Same meaning less oxygen use. How are you doesn't mean anything, and if anything, offensive is what it is. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif' /><!--endemo-->

    Hi doesn't start a topic, it just greets the other person. "How are you" is potentially an excellent topic introducer. Unless the other person subconciously knows they are supposed to start talking about things that happend to them...
  • GeminosityGeminosity :3 Join Date: 2003-09-08 Member: 20667Members
    Conversations aren't so much about 'efficiency' (you scare me) or even what you say. They're usually more about how you say stuff and how you connect =3
    You could still be the most elegantly spoken and efficient converseur in existance but people could still think you're a numpty ^^
  • CplDavisCplDavis I hunt the arctic Snonos Join Date: 2003-01-09 Member: 12097Members
    lol good point, George Carlin and I think Maddox think the same way,


    great minds think alike <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/biggrin.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='biggrin.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • DiscoZombieDiscoZombie Join Date: 2003-08-05 Member: 18951Members
    in my experience, when people ask 'how are you?' they mean it -- but I tend to avoid phonies, there's no point in even interacting with them.

    in turn, I try not to say anything I don't mean, even if it's customary. 'what's up?' > 'how are you?' anyway :>
  • BlobbyBlobby Join Date: 2004-06-11 Member: 29234Members
    So all this time that I've been responding, "I'm a little hungry and low on cash," it was the wrong thing to say? I always take that question seriously. Sometimes I say 'good' when I am good. But that's not always the case.
  • BigMadSteveBigMadSteve Join Date: 2003-02-12 Member: 13472Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Geminosity+Aug 10 2004, 07:16 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Geminosity @ Aug 10 2004, 07:16 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> I love the fact that so many people are almost programmed into saying that XD

    Even I am a bit... it leads to weird things though where you just meant to say hi while walking past someone. You're saying 'how are you?' yet both of you keep walking while they respond (usually with little time to ask how you're doing in response as the distance grows). Very weird but funny =3 <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    There is this one guy in my work that does this all the time. He walks by me and says "alright man, how are you?. Then 2 minutes later he walks by again. "almight man, hows it going?".

    We also have this foriegn guy. He's is dead funny. Instead of saying something like "hi, how are you?" he says: HOW ARE YOU DOING MOHAMMED? HOWS MONKEY BUSINESS?" It's much funnier hearing it than reading it. He calls just about everyone Mohammed.
  • CabooseCaboose title = name(self, handle) Join Date: 2003-02-15 Member: 13597Members, Constellation
    Wow, this guy scares me too. He should change his name to Spok or somthing because he has no conceivable idea as to what spontanious conversation is. He's trying to apply logic to somthing that isn't supposed to have logic and racking his brain in the process.

    FCC, if somebody walks up to you and said "hi." you reply "hi." Conversation over.

    Now, "hi, how are you?" initiates a conversation. It has 2 parts, a greeting, and a question. The "how are you?" Extends the conversation to somthing a bit more meaningfull than just the customary greeting of "hi".

    You may feel that talking to other human beings is not your cup of tea, well, maybe people come up to you with "hi, how are you?" because they actually want to know? Maybey, once you get past the akward feeling you have when talking to people, you'd realize that.

    Try it some time. Put a smile on your face, walk up to somebody in an appropriate situation and say "Hi, how are you?" you may get a conversation started, in which case, assuming you were not coming off as aprehensive and not talking to a total jerk would get a smile back and a responce of "I'm good." or somthing similar. Then, instead of hushing up the second the other person sais that, continue on the conversation and you'll be happy!

    Yay, now I'm rambeling and doubting if what I'm saying makes any sence, but yea...
  • FCCFCC Join Date: 2003-07-16 Member: 18218Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Blobby+Aug 10 2004, 02:08 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Blobby @ Aug 10 2004, 02:08 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> So all this time that I've been responding, "I'm a little hungry and low on cash," it was the wrong thing to say? I always take that question seriously. Sometimes I say 'good' when I am good. But that's not always the case. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    No, you're simply responding to a pseudo question in hope of reviving the true context of the question. The one who is performing the wrong-doing is the person asking you the question. He doesn't actually care whether you're hungry or low on cash.
  • Jim_has_SkillzJim_has_Skillz Join Date: 2003-01-19 Member: 12475Members, Constellation
    The phrase "Hi, How Are You" is perfectly acceptable to say. I really don't see anything wrong with it. So far your only argument against it is that everyone is programmed into saying it, which really isn't a bad thing. When someone asks me how I am doing, like my family or friends, I feel a little better someone cares about me. Even though it is a simple phrase and really doesn't mean much, the meaning behind it is worth much more than the words themselves.

    Personally, I think George Carlin is more funny when he does his Airline bit.
  • FCCFCC Join Date: 2003-07-16 Member: 18218Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Caboose+Aug 10 2004, 02:28 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Caboose @ Aug 10 2004, 02:28 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Wow, this guy scares me too. He should change his name to Spok or somthing because he has no conceivable idea as to what spontanious conversation is. He's trying to apply logic to somthing that isn't supposed to have logic and racking his brain in the process.

    FCC, if somebody walks up to you and said "hi." you reply "hi." Conversation over.

    Now, "hi, how are you?" initiates a conversation. It has 2 parts, a greeting, and a question. The "how are you?" Extends the conversation to somthing a bit more meaningfull than just the customary greeting of "hi".

    You may feel that talking to other human beings is not your cup of tea, well, maybe people come up to you with "hi, how are you?" because they actually want to know? Maybey, once you get past the akward feeling you have when talking to people, you'd realize that.

    Try it some time. Put a smile on your face, walk up to somebody in an appropriate situation and say "Hi, how are you?" you may get a conversation started, in which case, assuming you were not coming off as aprehensive and not talking to a total jerk would get a smile back and a responce of "I'm good." or somthing similar. Then, instead of hushing up the second the other person sais that, continue on the conversation and you'll be happy!

    Yay, now I'm rambeling and doubting if what I'm saying makes any sence, but yea... <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    No, your post makes sense or else I would't be replying to it.

    My original post was to manifest just how meaningless the question "how are you?" is. In doing so, I never stated I detested spontanious conversations, but rather, I detested <b>how</b> spontanious conversations were initiated by "how are you?" I would rather someone ask something more applicable such as "did you see the game last night?"

    I can't comprehend how replying with "hi" would end the conversation. , but replying with "Hi, I'm doing fine" would not. Either way, the conversation can continue in whatever way you wish.

    I wish people would stop making personal attacks, oh meeting people is not his cup of tea - what a loser, when I was simply stating my thoughts on how meaningless it is initiate a conversation with "Hi, how are you?"
  • FCCFCC Join Date: 2003-07-16 Member: 18218Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Jim has Skillz+Aug 10 2004, 02:30 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Jim has Skillz @ Aug 10 2004, 02:30 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> The phrase "Hi, How Are You" is perfectly acceptable to say. I really don't see anything wrong with it. <b>So far your only argument against it is that everyone is programmed into saying it, which really isn't a bad thing</b>. When someone asks me how I am doing, like my family or friends, I feel a little better someone cares about me. Even though it is a simple phrase and really doesn't mean much, the meaning behind it is worth much more than the words themselves.

    Personally, I think George Carlin is more funny when he does his Airline bit. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    That is precisely my point. Everyone is programmed to reply with "Fine" so why bother to answer the question, or even ask the question, when the answer is always the same.
  • ZigZig ...I am Captain Planet&#33; Join Date: 2002-10-23 Member: 1576Members
    when i say "How're you doing?" (or 'ayadoin) i mean it.. and when i answer the question, i keep it concise, but i mean it.. <!--emo&:(--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/sad.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • Jim_has_SkillzJim_has_Skillz Join Date: 2003-01-19 Member: 12475Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin-FCC+Aug 10 2004, 11:54 AM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (FCC @ Aug 10 2004, 11:54 AM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> <!--QuoteBegin-Jim has Skillz+Aug 10 2004, 02:30 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Jim has Skillz @ Aug 10 2004, 02:30 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> The phrase "Hi, How Are You" is perfectly acceptable to say.  I really don't see anything wrong with it.  <b>So far your only argument against it is that everyone is programmed into saying it, which really isn't a bad thing</b>.  When someone asks me how I am doing, like my family or friends, I feel a little better someone cares about me.  Even though it is a simple phrase and really doesn't mean much, the meaning behind it is worth much more than the words themselves.

    Personally, I think George Carlin is more funny when he does his Airline bit. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    That is precisely my point. Everyone is programmed to reply with "Fine" so why bother to answer the question, or even ask the question, when the answer is always the same. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    True but if it didn't mean anything, people would stop saying it. When you say "Hi, How Are You?" you are being inquisitive into someones life and that can cheer someone up, even if they are feeling down. So far you have been trying to make a point that we shouldn't say this phrase just because it has been built into our heads. You want something to change that has been built into our heads as a friendly gesture. Yes there are tons of people that respond to that phrase with something different like "Tasty" but for most people the response will be the same and for one I don't really care if we all say the same thing every time. It still means someone cares about you or is interested in you or something like that.
  • im_lostim_lost TWG Rule Guru Join Date: 2003-04-26 Member: 15861Members
    By the same logic, people should stop saying "thank you", because normally people say it just because they are used to saying it, not because they really feel thankful enough that they feel the need to express their thanks.
  • ThE_HeRoThE_HeRo Join Date: 2003-01-25 Member: 12723Members
    You gotta think about the sex of the person asking the question, and the sex of the person answering the question.

    Now we're talking.

    Then you get into "flirting" and etc. Gets more complicated.
  • EpidemicEpidemic Dark Force Gorge Join Date: 2003-06-29 Member: 17781Members
    Thank you goes some way to create some goodwill.. But I agree, how are you sounds old fashioned <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo--> What's up man! is the new groove, something <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif' /><!--endemo-->
  • im_lostim_lost TWG Rule Guru Join Date: 2003-04-26 Member: 15861Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Epidemic+Aug 10 2004, 12:53 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Epidemic @ Aug 10 2004, 12:53 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> how are you sounds old fashioned <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo--> What's up man! is the new groove, something <!--emo&:)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/smile.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='smile.gif' /><!--endemo--> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Maybe the expression should be updated to include more common vernacular. I'm not worried about that (it depends more on the audience, really). However, that's far different than removing the expression completely.
  • twoflowtwoflow Singing Drunk Join Date: 2002-11-01 Member: 1950Members, Constellation
    <!--QuoteBegin-ThE HeRo+Aug 10 2004, 08:51 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (ThE HeRo @ Aug 10 2004, 08:51 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Now we're talking. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    "How YOU doin'?"
  • FCCFCC Join Date: 2003-07-16 Member: 18218Members
    To those who wish to be unique and answer the actual context of the question, good for you. But for those who aren't, the question itself can be passed by as something offensive. As can thank you, sorry, when they they don't mean anything. But whatever, what can you do about it? Just give up and become assimilated into the growing world of idiotic phrases - LOL!!!!!! I rest my case.
  • GeminosityGeminosity :3 Join Date: 2003-09-08 Member: 20667Members
    Have you ever considered that you're putting way too much value into a bundle of catchphrases? =P

    I mean look how many people use the word 'the' and 'my' and 'and'. Show us what you're made of!!! make up your own language and be different so nobody can understand you =D
  • SnidelySnidely Join Date: 2003-02-04 Member: 13098Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-Geminosity+Aug 10 2004, 04:36 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (Geminosity @ Aug 10 2004, 04:36 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> Have you ever considered that you're putting way too much value into a bundle of catchphrases? =P

    I mean look how many people use the word 'the' and 'my' and 'and'. Show us what you're made of!!! make up your own language and be different so nobody can understand you =D <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    It wouldn't work. It would just be "pots em morf gnillik niaga?" instead of "how are you?".
  • ZigZig ...I am Captain Planet&#33; Join Date: 2002-10-23 Member: 1576Members
    <!--QuoteBegin-FCC+Aug 10 2004, 01:09 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td><b>QUOTE</b> (FCC @ Aug 10 2004, 01:09 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteEBegin--> To those who wish to be unique and answer the actual context of the question, good for you. But for those who aren't, the question itself can be passed by as something offensive. As can thank you, sorry, when they they don't mean anything. But whatever, what can you do about it? Just give up and become assimilated into the growing world of idiotic phrases - LOL!!!!!! I rest my case. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
    you rest your case..? what <i>CASE</i>??

    you mean your observation of common phrases having different meanings? guess what, einstein, it happens fairly often <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html//emoticons/confused.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused.gif' /><!--endemo-->
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