Gah **** Day :/
<div class="IPBDescription">Had a row with my ex again :(</div> Had another row with my ex again today seems to happen everytime we start talking again <!--emo&:(--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/sad-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->. She tries to get all chummy with me again then tries to ask me out I say no then we row <!--emo&:(--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/sad-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->.
Rinse repeat etc this has been going on since we split up about 6 months ago and I'm getting fed up with it, wouldn't be so bad but I have to work with this woman and see her pretty much everyday.
Rinse repeat etc this has been going on since we split up about 6 months ago and I'm getting fed up with it, wouldn't be so bad but I have to work with this woman and see her pretty much everyday.
Comments
You hit it off, getting past the mistakes of last time easily, and finding that she is an amazing woman.
or...
The date goes not too well, and its pretty obvious to the both of you that you have no chemistry. Afterwards you try and make her feel better, but you only make her realize more and more, it'll only work as you two friends- otherwise, you're a bit screwed.
You hit it off, getting past the mistakes of last time easily, and finding that she is an amazing woman.
or...
The date goes not too well, and its pretty obvious to the both of you that you have no chemistry. Afterwards you try and make her feel better, but you only make her realize more and more, it'll only work as you two friends- otherwise, you're a bit screwed. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
Quaunaut, I know you mean well, but if this is the same Ex-Girlfriend he's been speaking about before, I don't think that's a good idea. Seems they've had their share of troubles before and he wants to put it behind him or something.
You hit it off, getting past the mistakes of last time easily, and finding that she is an amazing woman.
or...
The date goes not too well, and its pretty obvious to the both of you that you have no chemistry. Afterwards you try and make her feel better, but you only make her realize more and more, it'll only work as you two friends- otherwise, you're a bit screwed. <!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
Quaunaut, I know you mean well, but if this is the same Ex-Girlfriend he's been speaking about before, I don't think that's a good idea. Seems they've had their share of troubles before and he wants to put it behind him or something. <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
You could be right, but at the same time: Unless she is *totally* a dimwit(I really don't know- is she?), she'd see pretty fast that there is no chemistry.
Sleeping around will earn her a boot in the hindquarters and a changed lock on the door *instantly*, and no third chance. If she's pregnant, sorry. Get lost. Hell, make it clear that you will only speak to her when absolutely neccessary, if she abuses the incredible amount of forgiveness you're showing (if you do decide to give a second chance).
People do grow and mature... and sometimes you never really grasp what you had until it's gone.
Further advice only useful if you do decide to attempt to pursue an actual relationship:
- If she has a strong enough libido to need to go with your best friend, you'd best spend more sack-time with her. Read books about it, respond, don't fall into the stereotypical male role. Seriously, go out of your way every time to avoid it. From the only examples of her behaviour given, it seems like that factors pretty heavily into her daily life.
- Talk. Honestly and openly. If you're ticked about something, then SAY it. Don't accuse (you're always belching at the dinner table!)... internalize so she won't become defensive (I may have to go into the other room to finish eating if that burping continues, as it's honestly making me feel ill, hon).
- Do NOT ever, ever EVER set up a joint checking account. Not even for petty funds. Not even if you get married. It's a HUGE problem. On the same vein, don't pool your savings on anything. It only brings strife.
- Give attention, but don't be posessive. The more you try to say 'my woman!' to every other guy around, most likely the less she'll want to be with you. Before relaxing in this manner, if you want a monogamous relationship, sit down and TALK about it. Work out every detail. (Yes, even while you're drunk you can't sleep with him. If you can't restrain yourself, don't get that drunk. if you do, even while drunk, you are GONE.) On another note, it's handy to have a list of allowed... they're so out there that they'll never happen, but it takes some of the 'captured' feeling out of things. Leo DiCaprio, Matthew Lillard, David Spade... whatever.
Quau you're a clever guy, but relationship expertise... no <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
That wouldn't work she's bisexual and once suggested we have a 3some with a homosexual bloke much to my disgust <!--emo&:angry:--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/mad-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='mad-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
<span style='color:red'>*Come on, V-Man. I know you're more intelligent than needing to evade the swear filter to get an idea across.* -Talesin</span>
Yeh but I was using it in the correct context <!--emo&:(--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/sad-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='sad-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Quau you're a clever guy, but relationship expertise... no <!--emo&???--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/confused-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='confused-fix.gif' /><!--endemo--> <!--QuoteEnd--> </td></tr></table><div class='postcolor'> <!--QuoteEEnd-->
This one got a giggle, thanks zig <!--emo&:p--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/tounge.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='tounge.gif' /><!--endemo-->
Might have to see about a transfer <!--emo&;)--><img src='http://www.unknownworlds.com/forums/html/emoticons/wink-fix.gif' border='0' style='vertical-align:middle' alt='wink-fix.gif' /><!--endemo-->