The results of me party

Deadlocke666Deadlocke666 Join Date: 2002-06-06 Member: 732Members
<div class="IPBDescription">How am i supposed to feel?</div>well, My slumber party, all nighter rpg/anime/icecream Bonanza is over. Oh man, it was soo much fun :-D

Almost all my friends came, cept for one but she's sick so I understand

And we had soo much fun!!! I mean it was great.

But then, after it all ended, my brother Came home crying on sunday night. He was all red faced and I hugged him and his heart was pounding so hard.

I asked him what was wrong?
He said that he lost his bestfriend, and he'll never be able to talk to his bestfriend again. He went into his room, and started playing Day of Defeat. I thought he would be okay, but then I come back 20 mins later, and he's sitting on his bed, crying, with a Razor in his hands. He had several short, but deep cuts along his arm and said "Why does God hate me?" I was so heartbroken and I hugged him.

Why does this stuff happen? Good things happen to me, but then my family goes through rivers of broken glass. Im sorry to be posting this on this forum, but I really dont have anywhere else to get massive feedback.

Later, I found out that his bestfriend was a girl whom he loved very much and for 4 years. I found out that she had cursed at him, then called him a liar, then went out with a person who publicly stated that he hates my brother.

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Im not sure what to do now, but I know that my brother needs help. Any advice would be greatly apreciated
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Comments

  • Spyder_MonkeySpyder_Monkey Vampire-Ninja-Monkey Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 8Members, NS1 Playtester, Contributor
    Heh, if I had a nickle for everytime I've seen something like this.

    There is one universal constant that I believe applies to 95% of the world when it comes to dating... you have to have bad relationships/experiences so that when something good comes along you know it for sure. I had about 3 bad breakups when I was 14-16, and during each of them I was depressed for about 3 weeks. I never did anything suicidal, but I honestly didn't care about my life during that time.

    The best advice I could offer you is to just be there for him, and explain to him that he's too young to let things like this worry him too much. Sure, it will hurt, and there's little that can be done for that. Pain heals, and sooner or later people like this girl are either going to realize their mistake and come around, or they won't matter to him anymore. Cheer him up anyway you can (gaming is a start), and let him know you're there for him to talk to if he ever feels comfortable enough to do it. At least he has a loving sister.
  • Deadlocke666Deadlocke666 Join Date: 2002-06-06 Member: 732Members
    I hope he'll be okay, Im so upset I should be sleeping for school, but he's like my Heroe.

    He showed me a game along time ago called "Doom 2" and ever since then, I've loved to play games with him. He taught me how to dance, he did my makeup for me for my Birthday, he defended me from these guys who wanted to violate me when I was 13 and he taught me how to program in C++.

    :&#39<!--emo&;)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=';)'><!--endemo--> I love my big brother. He's the Guy you see in the mall, with Mulitcolored hair, and an Acoustic guitar strapped on his back, always helping people he doesn't even know. He's the guy who never defends himself, but always is ready to rip someone apart who's hurting the people he loves. He's also the guy who has extremely low self esteem and lets people walk over him.

    The Outgoing, Caring, Nerdy, Crazy looking guy who is more gentle than a Summer breeze.

    It hurts that he's hurting, but maybe if I keep being near him he wont feel so bad.

    Thank you for talking to me sir
  • MouseMouse The Lighter Side of Pessimism Join Date: 2002-03-02 Member: 263Members, NS1 Playtester, Forum Moderators, Squad Five Blue, Reinforced - Shadow, WC 2013 - Shadow
    <!--QuoteBegin--Deadlocke666+June 11 2002,20:56--></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td><b>Quote</b> (Deadlocke666 @ June 11 2002,20:56)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE"><!--QuoteEBegin-->He's the Guy you see in the mall, with Mulitcolored hair, and an Acoustic guitar strapped on his back, always helping people he doesn't even know. He's the guy who never defends himself, but always is ready to rip someone apart who's hurting the people he loves. He's also the guy who has extremely low self esteem and lets people walk over him.

    The Outgoing, Caring, Nerdy, Crazy looking guy who is more gentle than a Summer breeze.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span id='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    believe it or not, your brother is just like me apart from the hair and the guitar. and the cool sister, i need me one of those

    But anyway i feel sorry for him, you and anyone else that this has made unhappy
  • SpoogeSpooge Thunderbolt missile in your cheerios Join Date: 2002-01-25 Member: 67Members
    Hmm, if you just turned 16, and he's your older brother, then he's on the verge of THE BEST years of his life!  No silly girl is worth throwing all of them away.  Talk about opportunity.  Late teens, early twenties.... man.  Why have one silly girl when you can go to a club and get 3! hehe.

    Really though, there must be something more to it like bad self image or some other hormonal nonsense.  The only advice I have is to be his friend.  You're obviously close so if anyone can cheer him up it's you.  However, if you think he's really in trouble, you should get him help ASAP.  Always better to be safe than sorry.

    You're 16 now, don't forget to enjoy it! <!--emo&;)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=';)'><!--endemo-->
  • MartMart Origin of SUYF Join Date: 2002-02-26 Member: 248Members
  • CommandoCommando Join Date: 2002-05-22 Member: 657Members, NS1 Playtester
    Hey mart, you always go on about your personal life (Maybe not on the forums) so don't shoot someone else down when they mention there's.

    <!--emo&:p--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':p'><!--endemo-->
  • SentrySteveSentrySteve .txt Join Date: 2002-03-09 Member: 290Members, Constellation
    I second what mart said.
  • MartMart Origin of SUYF Join Date: 2002-02-26 Member: 248Members
    It's all about entertainment value...

    Fixing ovens is amusing.
  • MoleculorMoleculor Namer-of-Bob Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 9Members
    <!--emo&:(--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':('><!--endemo--> Hate it when stuff like this happens.

    Whatever you do, you can't let him start using that razor. I've known a person or two that starts cutting themselves and after that its a hell of a time to get them to stop.

    Just be there for him, listen, ask how he's holdin' up occasionally.
  • Right_Behind_YouRight_Behind_You Join Date: 2002-04-23 Member: 501Members
    ...This happened to me when I was younger. Any advice would either be redundant or would offend you so... i'm sorry that i can't offer anything but... I used to act like i didn't see people looking at me, then i got a few freinds, then people liked me. They only liked me because they wanted to be cool by association. So truely, through my whole life i had only one freind. Sure, i tried suicide, but it only makes it worse. What you need to do is be a good sister and the next time you go out to the mall, to a freinds house, or to the movies, take him along with you, try to make him a person thats usually there when your freinds are with you. My freind was someone named Ami, the only reason im alive today is because she talked me out of suicide. So try to make your brother your 'best freind', be one of those people that always has their older sibling with them, trust me it will make him feel better. Even if he doesn't want to come along, just stay there with him and have some fun. Play some playstation and let him know you care about him.

    As you can see im very passionate about this. And my freind Ami... well shes a lesbian and i dont consider a freind any more. Apparently i was dating someone, and she was cheating on me with Ami. When i found out... well you get the idea, it happened about 3 months ago. I'll never forgive her but we still talk a little bit.
  • RhoadsToNowhereRhoadsToNowhere i r 8 Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 33Members
    Man...I'm really sorry to hear that.  It certainly does seem like dating is one of the areas that really drives people to act rashly in my experience.  I know I've been really upset sometimes because of the reactions that I get from girls that I like, probably more upset than I have been about other things.  Make sure you talk things over with him, I'm sure he would appreciate the company, especially with someone who can provide a female point of view.
  • BananBanan Join Date: 2002-02-22 Member: 235Members
    <!--QuoteBegin--Deadlocke666+June 11 2002,04:56--></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td><b>Quote</b> (Deadlocke666 @ June 11 2002,04:56)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE"><!--QuoteEBegin-->The Outgoing, Caring, Nerdy, Crazy looking guy<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span id='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    hmmm, your brother kinda sounds like me :/
    How old is he now`?
  • TzarconTzarcon Join Date: 2002-02-28 Member: 259Members
    That is one of the saddest things I have ever heard. It's important that you make sure that razor stays as far away from him as possible, During a period like this it's hard to think about other things, or to realize that it will pass. I know that you wont be able to talk him out of it for a few weeks, or if he's strong about it it make only take a week. Just be with him ALOT. You probalby won't be leaving the house too much. Just do stuff together. Like mentioned Gaming is a start. Often playing some videogames with your friends is the most cheering thing in the world. I personally love playing a good strategy game (Starcraft, Age of Empires 2, Empire Earth) with my friends.

    He will probably be trying to use that razor when you're not around at the early stages, so be careful. Give a reason to stay alive and he'll soon realize by himself that his life is still worth living
  • SentrySteveSentrySteve .txt Join Date: 2002-03-09 Member: 290Members, Constellation
    I always thought that "It is better to have loved and lost then never loved at all" was wrong.  From my own experiences -- and if your bro never liked this girl at all, then he would not try to be killing himself.  Good luck to your brother.
    <span style='color:black'>Dead is annyoing, "she" (lets be honest, dead is probably a guy) acts too over the top. EVERYONE has problems, not to sound cold, or heartless - but deal with it.  Get over it.  I have had things about 5 times worse than that happen to me.  Do you see me on here being a pity #####?  Get over it, dead.  Oh, and have a nice day.</span>
  • GwahirGwahir Join Date: 2002-04-24 Member: 513Members, Constellation
  • SlycasterSlycaster Limited Edition Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 24Members, NS1 Playtester
    Thats really harsh, sorry to hear your bro is going through that much of a hard time, i know the feeling, my friend who i'd known for 6 years moved when away, it seroisly hurt alot.

    Edit, on a lighter side note...

    Next time you have a party, try getting DDR and pad, seroisly, its so fun, i had a blast lastweekend playing it <!--emo&:)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':)'><!--endemo-->



    <!--EDIT|Cyanide|June 11 2002,14:22-->
  • Right_Behind_YouRight_Behind_You Join Date: 2002-04-23 Member: 501Members
    You have no idea. His freind betrayed him by going out with someone that hates his guts. Sure, your freind moves away, but you dont hate eachother. Think of it, everyday you would have to see someone that hates your guts and knows your deepest secrets. You wouldnt be able to trust anyone anymore. Untill you experience something like that, your never the same. Its still eating me on the inside. Everytime I see my old best freind, I feel like my body freezes on the inside-out.
  • GencideGencide Join Date: 2002-05-30 Member: 698Members
    Sorry to hear that and on such a day as your birthday, thats gotta be bad  <!--emo&:(--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/sad.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':('><!--endemo-->

    I'm sure your brother will come around in time, give him awhile. Breakups are the worst, but they DO happen, and people just have to live with it.
  • Deadlocke666Deadlocke666 Join Date: 2002-06-06 Member: 732Members
    I've been with my brother non stop. Everywhere I went, I took him with me, and everywhere he went(Mostly 7-11) I went with him.

    Today, during Toonami on Cartoon network, my brother pulled that God Forsaken razor out of his Back pocket. I looked at him and said "Cut me too if your going to cut yourself" and a tear ran down my face. When he saw that, he went into the backyard, and tossed the razor into the forest behind us. He came back and hugged me and said "Im not going to hurt you again."  <!--emo&:)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':)'><!--endemo-->

    Everything is going to be just fine. Im planning to taking him with me and my friends when we have our Street Fighter Alpha 3 Sessions. He'll feel better once my friend Amanda has whooped his ### with Zangief. Things will be good , I know they will
  • Blinking_FlipBlinking_Flip Join Date: 2002-01-25 Member: 55Members
    Let your brother know that we are all thinking of him, I have never got so badly depresed, I'm lucky I guess I never get depressed just fed up, but when I do get fed up I go out into the hills where I live on my mountain bike and just ride on my own and it makes me feel alive again. I know it sounds daft but just getting away from houses, cars, computers, people, everything I find clears my head better than anything, thats just my way of dealing with things.

    You both take care of yourselves and i'm sure your brother realises that while killing himself might be a way for him to get away from it all it would also destroy everyone that loves him most in the world, I'm so glad he threw the razor away, take care of one another.

    Blinkin
  • GobyWanGobyWan Join Date: 2002-02-22 Member: 234Members
    My best friend (who's a lesbian and NOT after my girlfriend <!--emo&:p--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':p'><!--endemo-->) went through this as well, and when someone is in this state you really have to show them alternatives to what they're doing. Rubber bands snapped on the wrist can cause pain without injury and help them to feel real, as the state they're in does not allow them to feel anything properly. Be supportive always.
  • Us3rUs3r Join Date: 2002-03-29 Member: 360Members
    Yeah, deadlocke, RBY.. /me goes through the same such stuff.

    I mean, deadlocke, I know EXACTLY how your brother feels, and I'm really sorry he had to resort to cutting himself over it. I know EXACTLY how you feel being on the side that gets hurt from him cutting himself. Hope everything stays as fine as you say it's going to be...

    RBY, I have a great best friend like you had, I'm very sad to hear that you had to lose her, hopefully you'll find someone else, girlfriend and/or best friend.

    Overall, hope everything works out for the best for both of you.
  • SlycasterSlycaster Limited Edition Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 24Members, NS1 Playtester
    wait, you can actually beat someone with zangeif, thats like.... impossible.
  • GencideGencide Join Date: 2002-05-30 Member: 698Members
  • TzarconTzarcon Join Date: 2002-02-28 Member: 259Members
    To be honest, deadlocke, when I read "Cut me too if you're going to cut yourself" a tear almost rolled down my face.

    on a lighter side note, that is absolutely awesome movie material  <!--emo&;)--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=';)'><!--endemo-->
  • UnknownUnknown Join Date: 2002-06-12 Member: 759Members
    <!--QuoteBegin--Deadlocke666+June 11 2002,04:56--></span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td><b>Quote</b> (Deadlocke666 @ June 11 2002,04:56)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE"><!--QuoteEBegin-->He's the Guy you see in the mall, with Mulitcolored hair, and an Acoustic guitar strapped on his back, always helping people he doesn't even know. He's the guy who never defends himself, but always is ready to rip someone apart who's hurting the people he loves. He's also the guy who has extremely low self esteem and lets people walk over him.

    The Outgoing, Caring, Nerdy, Crazy looking guy who is more gentle than a Summer breeze.<!--QuoteEnd--></td></tr></table><span id='postcolor'><!--QuoteEEnd-->
    Hehe your brother sounds like me.  Except for the hair and guitar.  I'm kinda having the same trouble he has been having.  I liked this one girl for well over a year now and I just asked her out about a month ago.  She did not give me an answer but instead said and I quote "OoOo...Im sorry....Im seeing someone else thou.....thank you for telling me thou".  She has not talked to me since (I can quote it like that cause I asked her on AIM <!--emo&:D--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'><!--endemo-->).  I don't know what to do.  I have her phone #(she gave it to me end of freshman year and now its the end of sophmore year) but I'm too nervous to talk to call her.

    As for your brother just try to be there for him.  Let him know there are people that are going through the samething.  (Sorry if this is over with.  I just read the first page.)
  • Right_Behind_YouRight_Behind_You Join Date: 2002-04-23 Member: 501Members
    Im glad to hear it all worked out. Youll be on the forums more now that we helped you right? Anyways, if you ever need someone to talk to (everyone for that matter), post your question on the forums or come on to IRC. We are always here to help a fellow NS fan. And Deadlocke, come on to IRC and talk to us, we IRC bums would like to hear from you! And Tzarcon, where im from, its like razorblades are the 'latest fad'. Im pretty used to hearing about this now, so i wasnt able to shed a tear. Ive been de-sensitized to suicide, ive had 7 people i know try suicide. Its just that i know too many people from 'The gutter'.
  • SlycasterSlycaster Limited Edition Join Date: 2002-01-24 Member: 24Members, NS1 Playtester
    just a thought, why would you want to end your life... even if there is one thing that goes wrong, you should always look forward and think what could go right, you shouldnt just end yourlife because of one thing in your life, you have YEARS to live it too the fullest... i could never do that to myself, ever, i guess im too optimistic or sumthing <!--emo&:p--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':p'><!--endemo-->
  • Right_Behind_YouRight_Behind_You Join Date: 2002-04-23 Member: 501Members
    Some people suffer from: Depression, ADD, ADHD, Cancer, AIDS... I know that these arent depression but it gives you a reason.
  • Deadlocke666Deadlocke666 Join Date: 2002-06-06 Member: 732Members
    YAY!!!!!!!!!!


    I showed my brother this site. He read all the good coments you guys said, and he told me something that I will never forget......."When your heart breaks, friends can help Sew it back together with nothing but words"

    He was soo happy, and I played a few games of Heroes of Might and Magic 3 with him(I let him win once, then I played to my fullest the rest of the games, but he still beat me 2 more times that I beat him). We stayed on his computer until like 9pm today. Then he hugged me and said "The Sun rises, even if I dont want it to rise" and smiled. He then went out with his friends, and he's coming back at like 12 he said.

    I was soo happy. He looked so much healthier today than he has for like awhile. Thank you all so much for being a caring Community. I was completely right about you all  <!--emo&:D--><img src="http://www.natural-selection.org/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif" border="0" valign="absmiddle" alt=':D'><!--endemo-->
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